Forty Years! That age that most people either dread with an intense hostility, a morbid fear, or anticipate with heightened excitement. Others couldn’t care “Two Hoots” about it and a small number are simply void of emotions about it.
Some say that forty is the new thirty, life begins at forty and one comes of age at that time. A Forty Year’s anniversary for a company, a marriage, a nation is generally awarded because it is seen as having attained some measure of maturity and experience. A Generation is also described as being forty years. so forty does account for something.
I myself am one of the number who dreaded forty. My dread was not one of hostility but one of fear. I did not know how I was expected to react, how I would feel, nor how I would be expected to conduct myself. I had even thought that I would suddenly join ranks of “old Folks.”
They reality, though was quite the opposite. The rejuvenation and excitement I felt slightly surprised me, but then I caught myself and re-assurance swept over me in torrents. I felt prepared to take on what had hitherto caused slight trepidation. I knew I was comfortable enough to make my decisions without being put off by what others may think of them. I knew better to not be accountable to another human for my likes or dislikes. I valued being comfortable in my own skin, my appearance, my attire, my choices without feeling the need to please. It was like huge bursts of sunshine flooding my being. My steps were purposeful and huge and mentally I had made my mind-shift. Turning forty for me had paid huge positive dividends.
Now we are starting off the final week in November staring down the barrel of the final forty days of 2021. We are still dealing with the dreaded Covid-1 Virus Pandemic and in many regards our frustration, fear, angst, irritability and worry continue to plague us. We have had some relief from restrictions, are anticipating more ease, but like turning forty, have reached a major milestone and must show evidence of maturing.
As a Fifties Queen who has lived through her forties, my advice is resolute. There is only one of you and your mental wellness must always take precedence. Your growth and development are your responsibility and your shine and brilliance must never be left to the whims and fancies of anyone else. You are purposefully designed for greatness and possess all that it takes within you to exceed your expectations into the final forty days of 2021 and well into 2022.
However, there are some keys that must be unlocked. As forty connotes growth and maturity, you must be willing to grow up. As you grow up, it is important to be aware of yourself. Everyone knows what takes him or her to the lowest level and with that in mind it is important to tune into that “thing or one” responsible for that cruel onslaught. Alternately, one always knows what soothes, comforts , heals and places him or her in a peaceful place, a warm fuzzy spot like I usually say. With this in mind growing up and maturing into self-awareness necessitates tapping into finding one’s balance.
Just as forty signifies throwing off what serves no purpose for the rest of 2021, it is vital that ways, habits, situations, interactions that no longer propel you into positivity, must be discarded and placed into the “throw-away heap.” Here signifies that you are now making decisions that suit you best just as one does at forty. You decide and Not someone else. You determine and Not another.
But of course the journey may sometimes see the creeping up of fear, memories of failure and huge phobias that had previously crippled your progress. That is natural and expected, yet should not be allowed to remain. The impact should be that of using those fears, failures and phobias as stepping stones for advancement. Once acknowledged, the script should be flipped and you can set yourself up for victory, rather than defeat.
Once you tackle those detours, you must be prepared to Embrace. There will be changes within you, around you and ahead of you . Your preparation for them is crucial. So right away, that mind-shift must begin. You have to embrace a new mindset to accommodate all the changes that will come with the forward thrusts and developments. As you take hold of your changes in tight hug embraces you will be more prone to accept the myriad of great opportunities that present themselves in your path.
The journey to forty continues. What happens at forty? What happens at forty is what you allow. Growing up, maturing and developing. Your self-awareness, purposeful decisions and discarding, coupled with your wholesome and discerning embracing of mindsets, changes and opportunities are what you require as you finish 2021 and anticipate 2022.
Garden Conversations with Roze 